How dating culture has changed

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With the arrival of dating apps there has been a change in how many of us are finding our partners and indeed what we are looking for. I was watching this video in which a cross section of people, were asked to use Tinder to find people they would go on a date with. There is no fear of failure because for every one or two rejections you get one or two matches.

This is a game that you can keep playing until you win.

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However, this can lead you to feel as if potential partners are expendable. As you know that there are more people out there who you might be a match with. Why limit yourself to one match when you can have 10? Or why settle for one partner when you have access to plenty? Every time we get a notification we get a little buzz of excitement. Just think how integral these random notifications are when online dating, a new message, another match, someone you want to talk to coming online.

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And remember it is not just one person we are talking to now but we can speak to s of potential partners. So, I would argue, we are not only getting validation from the attention from potential partners, but the game aspect can actually make us addicted to this type of dating through the random notifications, which spike our dopamine. With those criteria, the Internet is a clear winner. Until someone mentions the old adage…you get what you pay for. Why stay tied down when you could meet a bunch of other people? The hook-up culture can seem appealing because it is low-risk and typically lacks those tearful breakups.

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These relationships can be easier, less stressful, exciting and they require no commitment. But I say, take that risk. No risk, no reward, right? Some of the loneliest people I know have many options and have no problem finding someone to spend the night with. Sex feels empty in hook-ups. To avoid getting wrapped up in the hook-up culture, communicate with your partner.

False hopes of a hook-up leading to a relationship can be heartbreaking.

Hooking up: How the dating culture has changed

The next major change in dating started with the introduction of matchmaking services and the internet. But the concept of online dating was being worked out way before the general public even had access to the internet. In , two Harvard students created what is known as "Operation Match" to make dating easier for young people. The "World Wide Web" officially became available to everyone in , and online dating websites were soon popping up all over the place: And it was at the turn of the 21st century that people also began using Craigslist as a way of linking up with other people romantically.

Shortly after, sites like OKCupid followed. In , you can't turn your head without finding someone who has at least one dating app on their phone: Tinder , Plenty of Fish , and Bumble , to name a few. While some people think this approach to dating really works, others collectively sigh at the thought of the current dating game.

Dating becomes a thing

So why are so many millennials complaining that dating nowadays is just too frustrating and complicated, when technology was supposed to make it easier? The individual has become more and more important in today's culture than ever before, and technology has played a big role in that. Just think of the concept of the selfie.

How dating has changed over the last years

This generation is much more focused on themselves than previous generations. Combined with the casual culture of hooking up, one night stands, and friends with benefits, actually finding someone to seriously date can be difficult. Millennials simply have so many options that "going steady" can be a hard pitch to sell. There is a case for both sides of this argument.

Nowadays, we have more freedom to choose how we live our lives. We make up our own rules or lack thereof and are allowed so many options in how we wish to interact with romantic partners. However, this is exactly what makes dating in so difficult. What does the other person want? Are they looking for something real or are they just trying to have fun?

Are there any mind games going on here?

About the Author

Today's dating world is certainly a maze, but that doesn't mean that love doesn't still happen. Whether you meet on Tinder, or you meet at a bar, you can end up finding "the one.

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Dating Is Dead - Kevin Carr - TEDxWilmingtonSalon

A proper match vs.